I was ambushed today. I am sorry I can not go into details but to rehash it here would be to gossip, and I don’t want to do that. As a side note, lest you think I’m all virtuous and such, gossip is something I have struggled with in the past, so I am definitely not being sanctimonious or pious here. I’m just trying to handle this the way God would like for me to. Having said that, I do want to make a point about something God showed me today.
I was unprepared. I walked in defenses down and was caught totally unawares. When I say my defenses were down, I am referring to two different things. One, I was not expecting what happened, but two, and more importantly, I did not have on my spiritual armor. I have not been doing a very good job lately of following the mandate in Ephesians 6.
10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. Ephesians 6:10-18 (NIV)
I had not had a quiet time with the Lord this morning before I headed out the door. While I did spend time at one point with Him yesterday, I did not start my day with Him, and I “fit it in” while I had a few minutes. I’ve been struggling in this area of late. I’ve been getting attacked from many sides and in many different ways, and I haven’t been prepared.
God is not the problem here. He never is. I am. He tells us what to do, and when we do it, it works. When we don’t, it doesn’t. It’s quite simple, actually. So why do I continue to go through these cycles? Why am I so blasted hard-headed? The answer is, I don’t know. But one thing I do know.
His mercies are new each day, and I praise Him for that. Tomorrow is another day, and if He is willing, I can try again. And maybe after the next attack, while the armor may look beaten and worn, at least it will have been in place and with His help, will remain intact.